Mirror Talk, Toddler Style: What My 4-Year-Old Taught Me About Self-Love

My 4-year-old is currently living her best double-life.

She’s deep in the “I wanna be a baby” phase but also confidently strutting into the “I can do it myself” phase. Honestly, it’s exhausting and adorable and slightly chaotic—kind of like parenting in general.

The Mirror Moment

The other day, she asked me to pick her up (cue the baby mode), so I scooped her up for a snuggle. We happened to be standing in front of the mirror in our entryway when I casually said:

“Hey, look in the mirror and say, ‘Hi reflection, you look great today!’”

Without skipping a beat, she looked herself in the eyes and declared:

“Hi, reflection. You look AMAZING today!”

She comes from a long line of one-uppers, so I can’t say I was shocked. But still…I was stunned—in the best way.

What if We Did That, Too?

Hearing my daughter hype herself up so effortlessly made me stop and wonder:

• When did that kind of confidence start feeling awkward for me?

• Why does complimenting ourselves feel cringey?

• And seriously, when’s the last time I told my reflection she looked amazing?

Inner Child Book Club Flashback

I once read “I Love You Through and Through” during a live session of Inner Child Book Club (yes, it’s a thing—yes, it’s as wonderful as it sounds). After reading it, I asked the participants to pause and consider:

What would life look like if we said those words to ourselves every day—and really meant them?

• “I love your happy side, your sad side…”

• “I love your hair and eyes and giggles and cries…”

We read those words to our kids. We want them to believe them. But do we?

Lessons From a 4-Year-Old Mirror Coach

• Speak kindly to yourself—out loud, like you're talking to your favorite person.

• Look yourself in the eyes and throw out a compliment. (Yes, you can say you look amazing today.)

• Don’t be afraid to be a little extra. Bonus points if you throw in some jazz hands or a sassy wink.

The Takeaway

The next time you catch your reflection while brushing your teeth or wrangling a toddler into pants, pause and channel that 4-year-old energy.

Say something good to yourself.

Say it with a smile. Say it with conviction.

Because honestly? You do look amazing today.

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