The Man in the Middle Seat

Have you ever found yourself on a flight, bracing for the long haul, only to discover an unexpected gem of a human being squished into the seat next to you? This is one of those stories.

It was a sunny morning, and I was on my way to Boise, Idaho for what promised to be an exhaustive work trip. I’d already traveled my first bit of the trip from Lansing to Chicago and sat patiently on my connecting flight headed west. I had the coveted aisle seat, and as the passengers shuffled in, I noticed the poor soul destined for the middle seat next to me. This "poor soul" turned out to be an incredible man named Somxay.

For the first leg of the journey, we sat in companionable silence. I had my ear buds in, drowning myself in music, while Somxay stared quietly at the back of the headrest in front of him. Normally, I'm the type to strike up conversations with strangers. Silence in the presence of others makes me squirmy. However, that day, I was mentally prepping for the trip ahead and wasn’t in the mood for chit-chat. Or so I thought.

My big mouth got the best of me when the flight attendant rolled by with coffee and cookies. I took my cookie, as did Somxay. Our window seat companion was in the land of nod. I always save my in-flight snacks for my kids – they think "airplane food" is the coolest thing ever. It's a cheap thrill for them that I’m not ready to give up just yet. My kids were only 2 and 4 at the time, leaving several more cookie souvenir years ahead.

As I tucked my uneaten cookie into my carry-on, I noticed Somxay take a little nibble of his. Unable to resist, I asked, “How’s the cookie?” He looked a bit surprised but then his eyes lit up. “It’s good!” he replied with a bright smile.

I explained my whole “cookie souvenir” ritual to him, and from that moment on, we were chums. Over the next hour or so, I learned more about his extraordinary life than I could have ever imagined, and I couldn’t help but regret the 30 minutes of silence we had wasted pre-snacks. Just imagine the stories I missed out on!

A Remarkable Journey

In our short time together, here’s what I discovered about Somxay. Originally from Laos, he now resided in Minnesota with his wife. His mother had passed away when he was just 6 years old, and he was on his way back home from a trip to Holland, Michigan, where he had visited his sister and her family.

He told me about the first time he saw his wife. It was like a scene from a romantic movie. Somxay was sitting on a rooftop, watching the market below, when he spotted her. From the way he described it, it was love at first sight... at least for him. He didn’t talk to her that day and kicked himself for it. But fate gave him another chance when she returned to the market a few days later. This time, he introduced himself.

She lived on a small island and would paddle her canoe to his village to shop at the market from time to time. Despite learning she had a boyfriend, Somxay wasn’t deterred. For the next 6 months or so, he paddled his canoe out to her island week after week, trying to win her over. He even spoke with her mother, declaring himself a better candidate for a son-in-law than her current boyfriend. His persistence paid off, and they eventually started dating, leading to their marriage and the birth of their son.Somxay and his wife had experienced a miscarriage before having their only son, who had blessed them with three grandchildren. He talked about his grandkids with such pride, his face practically glowed.

Somxay’s journey took a dramatic turn in the late 1970s when he and his wife escaped from Laos due to the turbulent political climate. They fled with several others, but tragically, his brother-in-law was killed during the escape. Somxay and his wife made it to a refugee camp in Thailand, where he worked as a laborer for $1 a day and his wife as a seamstress for $2 a day.

Life in the camp was tough, especially since they were surrounded by refugees from countries considered enemies of Laos. It was an uncomfortable living situation, to say the least. In 1980, Somxay’s sister, who had already immigrated to America, sponsored him and his wife to move to the United States. He recalled receiving $50 in the mail from his sister, which made him feel like a millionaire. He used the money to buy new, clean clothes for their journey to America.

Upon arriving in the U.S., Somxay and his wife worked hard to build a new life. He climbed the career ladder at Boston Scientific, a medical technology manufacturer, while his wife did the same at Miracle Ear, a well-known hearing aid company. Despite the hardships, Somxay spoke of his journey with a sense of contentment and gratitude that was truly inspiring.

Embracing Happiness

As the plane began its descent, I continued to pepper Somxay with questions about his life. One phrase kept coming up in his responses: “I’m happy.” No matter how difficult the situation he described, he always finished with, “But we were happy.”

In our final moments together, as the plane taxied to the gate, Somxay offered some last words of wisdom. “Don’t wait. Do it now,” he said, urging me to seek fun and adventure. Before we parted ways, he humbly added, “I’m glad you talked to me. My wife tells me I talk a lot. I get it from my dad.” I was flabbergasted. HE was glad I talked to HIM? Clearly, I was the benefactor in this exchange.

I thanked him for sharing his incredible life story with me, and he left me with one final nugget of wisdom: “You can’t shut yourself out from the rest of the world. We must learn and grow.” And after snapping quite possibly my favorite selfie of all time, Somxay walked off, leaving me with a head full of thoughts and a heart full of inspiration.

Gentle Reminders

Meeting Somxay was a reminder that wisdom often comes from the most unexpected places. His story taught me that change, no matter how daunting, can lead to happiness if we embrace it with the right mindset. It also reminded me of the importance of persistence and resilience in the face of adversity.

Somxay’s journey from a tiny village in Laos to a successful life in America was filled with trials and tribulations, yet he remained positive and happy. His story is a testament to the power of love, determination, and the human spirit.

So, next time you’re on a flight, or simply going about your day, take a moment to talk to a stranger. (Even though your parents probably told you to never do that.) You never know what incredible stories and wisdom they might share with you. Embrace change, seek out new experiences, and always be open to learning and growing. Life is full of unexpected twists and turns, and it’s up to us to make the most of them.